Janice Taylor, Oprah Winfrey’s top 150 tech pioneers, social tech entrepreneurs, inspirational speakers, authors, online safety advocate, healing mentor, investor, mother, and advisor.

From her teen years into adulthood, Janice’s specialty has constantly been uncovering the root cause of emotional pain to create an innovative and disruptive healing process. After more than two decades of research and practice, uniquely qualified in the fields of psychology, tech start-up, business, motivational speaking, and entrepreneurism; Janice Taylor created Ah-ha Healing.

A unique revolutionary healing modality with a multidisciplinary approach whose sole purpose is to SOLVE early pain points in humans and transform them into Purpose.

Janice has also been decorated with a number of achievements such as:
2021 Harvard University Master’s In Psychology, Extension Studies (Graduate 2024)
2021 Honorary Captain Royal Canadian Navy, Canadian Armed Forces
2020 Universal Professional Coaching and Positive Psychology Certificate
2019 Co-Chair, National Steering Committee for POWER OF HER, World Vision Canada
2018 Distinguished Honorary Alumni Award for the University of Regina
2017 Woman of the Year, Canada – Startup Nominee
2017 Top 40 over 40 Tech CEO, Recipient
2017 Women of Influence, Recipient
2017 Top Canadian Female CEO – The Board list
2017 Tech Women Canada Recipient NYC
2017 Startup Canada Top Female Startup Finalist
2017 ESM Top 15 Women Entrepreneur
2013 Recipient of CBC Radio’s Saskatchewan Future 40
2012 Top 40 Under 40
2010 Top 150 Oprah Winfrey Viewers to Watch
2016-2020 Top 10 Most Influential Women of British Columbia
2019 STEM Women to Watch in BC
2012-2019 1 of only 5% of Tech Companies in Canada Run by a Woman
1st Female-Led Tech Company for Families that Tackles Addiction and the Negative Impacts of Social
Media

You Can Find Janice at:

Website: https://ahhahealing.com/#exclusive

Company: Ah-ha Healing
Instagram @ah_ha_healing
Facebook Ahava Healing
Twitter @AhavahealingInc
LinkedIn Ah-ha Healing
Youtube Ah-ha Healing: Find Your Purpose

Personal: Janice Taylor
Instagram janicetaylor3525
Facebook Janice Taylor
Twitter @JustBeJanice
LinkedIn Janice Taylor

Transcript:

[Jon Dabach] 00:00
Today on the relationship Revival Show we have a special guest named Janice Taylor. Janice is one of Oprah Winfrey’s top 150 tech pioneers. She’s a social tech entrepreneur, inspirational speaker, and author, online safety advocate, healing mentor, investor, mother and advisor. From her teen years into adulthood, Janice’s specialty has constantly been uncovering the root cause of emotional pain to create an innovative and disruptive healing process.

[Jon Dabach] 00:27
After more than two decades of research and practice uniquely qualified in the fields of psychology, tech startup business, motivational speaking and entrepreneurism, Janice Taylor created AHA healing, a unique revolutionary healing modality with a multidisciplinary approach whose sole purpose is to solve early pain points in humans and transform them into purpose.

[Jon Dabach] 00:52
You’re listening to the relationship revival podcast with Jon Dabach, also known as Mr. Spirituality. That’s me. I’m your host, giving you insights and guidance from over 10 years in the field of this amazing journey we call romance on this show, I go over everything you need to know about how to get into a relationship, how to get the most out of a relationship, and sometimes even how to gracefully end a relationship without pulling your hair out and going crazy.

[Jon Dabach] 01:19
And occasionally, I’m even joined by new and old friends who are also relationship experts to bring you guidance and wisdom with new perspectives. Thanks for stopping by Janice Taylor, thank you so much for being here.

[Janice Taylor] 01:32
Thank you so much for having me. I really appreciate it. Yeah, anytime

[Jon Dabach] 01:36
I can explore a new modality to help people heal and kind of understand the theory, selfishly, that’s just you know, maybe it’s another tool in my own belt, maybe it’s something I can refer to people. So I think people in my position really got into doing what they do, because we want to help. So if it’s like, if it’s if there’s a way where there’s something out there that will help even just one person I meet somewhere down the line, I feel like it’s totally worth it. So tell me, so you created this modality called a Hava, right?

[Janice Taylor] 02:11
Yes, this has been a lifelong Yes. Journey to creating it.

[Jon Dabach] 02:16
And what is it? And what is the theory? And who does it help?

[Janice Taylor] 02:19
Yeah, great question. So haha, really, for me is the is the name of the theory. And I was most I grew up on the streets, like many people did, my dad was an addict, I spent half my life at his house where it was literally everyone. And then I go to my mom’s house, and she was trying to figure out how to feed us. So it was really in that environment in the thick of it.

[Janice Taylor] 02:38
And I was always sort of fascinated by like, how do we heal from these experiences that we have as kids, I’ve always wanted to understand that piece of the puzzle. And so really study it. Well, what happens before our 10th birthday that creates, I call it the break in the spirit, or you could say the psychic wound according to Gabor Ma Tei. And there’s other different variations of the exact same thing.

[Janice Taylor] 03:02
But I didn’t want to call it trauma per se, because I feel that people say Oh, I don’t have trauma, when really you can still have that break in the spirit where we feel this break of a love and belonging, a sense of like, where do I belong? And do I matter? And I really wanted to get to the root of that to say what’s happening in that lifelong feeling that many of us experience.

[Janice Taylor] 03:25
In fact, I would say 99% of the world has a bit of that break, where we kind of go, what’s the point in my life?

[Janice Taylor] 03:32
And I wanted to understand that so I I started it really I say 40 years ago, because the very first program I went into as an at risk youth was like, how do we prevent this kid from being an addict was really the focus because I saw, I basically started to write the theory of that first program when I was eight years old, but really dove into it when I was doing my psychology degree. And the fundamental question was, how do we heal from our early pain points before our 10th Birthday often?

[Janice Taylor] 04:03
And what is the point of these painful experiences that we have? And can we make more sense of them? But more importantly, could we heal that core root of pain?

[Jon Dabach] 04:13
Okay, well, so it’s, it sounds like you’ve identified the problem. How does a Havas a theory? Or how has your company and the brand? Like what is the actual practice of the work that goes into it look?

[Janice Taylor] 04:27
So the theory pulled from 12 different series and a multiple different therapeutic processes. So I looked across religious studies, psychology, and neuroscience, what is this whole new age self-help? I think therefore I am, I really looked at the gamut of theories that I pulled from each one of them that I felt could address the core root of the problem. And there’s other different types of approaches, whether its client centered therapy and different therapies.

[Janice Taylor] 04:54
So I looked across the gamut of what existed and I felt that a lot of them kind of got you halfway. There. So we take that theory. And then I created 12 steps and actually three phases that really, first of all discover what the pain point is. And I felt that there needed to be more definitions of that pain point versus Oh, this is your symptoms, and here’s your diagnosis and mental health, I felt that there was more to that data. So we extract that data, and we put it onto a whiteboard.

[Janice Taylor] 05:24
But we look at all of the connective tissue, I created a math formula to then address while you’re stuck here, a portion of your emotional being is stuck before your typical day, can we pluck out that thorn, heel down the route and continue this process for six months? Over those 12 exact steps, and every single step is slightly different. That takes you on a continuum of health of emotional healing.

[Janice Taylor] 05:50
One of the things I think that’s most interesting for me that I discovered, emotional pain actually is a system. When you experience that break, it’s not like oh, my dad’s bad. My mom’s bad. It’s that’s actually not what’s what transpires, although that story starts, it’s actually a system of emotional pain.

[Janice Taylor] 06:08
And if you don’t address healing from a system perspective, highly, highly, you will still repeat the same pattern, you’ll hit the wall, you’ll come back, you’ll hit the wall, you’ll come back. And most people that have gone through therapy have felt that they get so far with it, but they ultimately hit the wall. And because of that, I needed to create a very concise program, very concise steps.

[Janice Taylor] 06:33
And each one of those steps we draw from a different theory. And we take people through a continuum of healing, that really we add a Hava, we say, you know, you really can heal this emotional root. And you can discover what you were always meant to be into. And you can let go of this past trauma. And you can experience the fullness of yourself. And so each step I spent 10 years studying in real life, humans, how to get those steps down to a precise science.

[Jon Dabach] 07:06
So there’s 12 steps over six months. Yeah. If you’re working with a certified practitioner, what are those look like those, like what does that relationship look like?

[Janice Taylor] 07:20
So they see you sometimes you could do an accelerated program where you want more intensive, so you’ll see them every week. It’s really interesting, the first phase of ahava, so the four steps that are in the first phase, and it’s you with a one on one healer.

[Janice Taylor] 07:32
In phase two, we pull from different modalities. And so we make up the team, I believe in a triage approach. So you may have a naturopath and massage therapist Reiki, and you may have your Hava healer taking you through that process. In phase two, when the body is ready, and the spirit is ready to dive in deeper into some of your emotional pain.

[Janice Taylor] 07:53
And then when you come through it into the last four phases, the four steps, then they’re actually taking you through another approach. So some of this you have intensive homework, I believe in an emotional fitness routine, which I believe most people don’t have, they have a physical fitness. But if you say oh, so what’s your daily emotional fitness routine?

[Janice Taylor] 08:12
And they’ll be like, Well, I see my therapist every two weeks or, you know, I meditate with calm once in a while. But they don’t really have a concise, daily emotional fitness routine for themselves that’s built custom for themselves as well.

[Jon Dabach] 08:28
That’s phase two.

[Janice Taylor] 08:30
That’s really the whole part of it. It builds each step builds on the next step. And then in phase two, you have a triage approach. And then when you come into homecoming, it’s a different teammates, so but the healer, the AHA healer takes you is your steady Eddie through the 12 full steps. And each one is concisely designed.

[Jon Dabach] 08:51
Got it. And so depending on what the wound, I guess you can call it is because you don’t want to use the word trauma, depending on what it is, and who you are kind of defines what that healing process looks like. And it’s customized to you.

[Janice Taylor] 09:06
Yeah, there’s a certain cadence, so no one skips the steps after all these years and hundreds and hundreds of people later, no one skips from two to seven. Never. So that’s predictable. And because they come from the tech industry that’s very predictable, people will always move from one to two from two to three, the initial whiteboard, which we call the calling center, that’s a session that’s a huge to two to three hour session.

[Janice Taylor] 09:30
So some of your core root data actually is really important. Like is your family Italian, where you born, where you first generation immigration, like all of those parts of your data actually inform the therapeutic practice, as opposed to now people are like, Oh, I should just go see a cognitive behavioral therapists, well, that may or may not work for you depending on where you are on your healing journey.

[Janice Taylor] 09:54
And so again, being from the tech industry, I was like, Okay, what’s the system? And can we create this study steps so that it anchors the world of healing. And I think that’s a really important distinction. If you look at the world of healing, you probably have seen now like, oh, you should have I Alaska or you should micro dose shrooms, or you should go to Burning Man, or you should meditate, or you should see a therapist, like there’s, there’s lots of tactics.

[Janice Taylor] 10:20
But the ultimate question for me was, okay, so when, where, when, how, and at what point? And so really, I looked at it and said, well, this is the world of healing tactics. Can we anchor this into a system that still addresses the same thing for every human being, but what sits on each step will be modified, depending on your own story?

[Jon Dabach] 10:44
Interesting. So the first, so I can wrap my head around it, you have these 12 steps, you said the first four were phase one, which sounds diagnostic in nature, more than anything

[Janice Taylor] 10:58
Less around the problem and more around the purpose. Okay. So we look at everything from the opposite point of view. So most people know their pain story. This happened to me, this is who I am. And it actually kicked that system, we would call it the ecosystem of you looking to solve that outside of yourself.

[Janice Taylor] 11:18
So it would kick in the storytelling. Oh, my brother’s this my sister’s that this is my life like that’s that remote, that sort of like constant memory. And so you pretty much have that on lock. Most humans. But what you don’t necessarily have is what does that initial pain point? What’s its opposite piece of data? And so if you think about emotional trauma, think of it like a battery, you know, a look at a battery, it’s got both ends of the battery, and one can’t charge without the other being in the right spot.

[Janice Taylor] 11:46
Well, most people know that negative side of their battery, they know what that means. But what they don’t know is what does that data point actually reveal on the other side of the moon? What is it on the positive side? What is it actually revealing about that? So the very first session is called the calling session. And I believe, and have been able to prove to a certain degree, that most of the data that you own before your 10th birthday is the purest the data that you own, even if it was horrible.

[Janice Taylor] 12:15
Even if it broke your heart, even if it caused you to be disconnected from yourself, it’s still the only data that you don’t pick. You don’t pick your mother or your father, you don’t pick your date of birth, you don’t pick your hair color, eye color skin color, and you don’t pick any of those things.

[Janice Taylor] 12:31
So but if you looked at it only from the one side of the perspective on the negative side of the battery, if you were to take that same data and plot it on the other side of the moon, what would it say? And would it give you different GPS coordinates? And would it tell you a different story about yourself? And so creating the math around that was took me about a decade to say could I actually intersect Pacific points of data that could tell this person their calling that it would ultimately tell them who they are and what they were always meant to be?

[Jon Dabach] 13:07
It sounds interesting, I’m having a hard time getting like a grounded example, especially when you say things like math. I’m like, wait, what? So like, do you have because you’ve worked with hundreds of people? Can you keeping it anonymous give me an example of a negative story or a negative thing and what the positive charges so I can ground it a little bit for myself?

[Janice Taylor] 13:29
Okay, so to stick any human being before your 10th birthday, let’s say that you are the middle child. Okay. Okay, so you’re the middle child of three. What do we know in society? What do they say about the middle child? Pretty much everyone, right? Black Sheep doesn’t fit in? My older siblings, the golden child, my younger is the spoiled one. I’m like the one that everyone craps on. I’m the middle child. Sure.

[Janice Taylor] 13:51
That’s, that’s the story. So you know that potentially your middle child syndrome, you had a second sibling or your youngest sibling was born two years from your birthday, okay. So you know that all of a sudden, you went from being the youngest to boom, there’s this new person, and everyone wants to pay attention to this new person because it’s a baby.

[Janice Taylor] 14:12
And so you being two are already observing, oh, wow, my worlds change. So that gives us the first indication of a potential date. Now, when let’s say that you’re the oldest child, and you are now born to your parents. And your parents also have a birth order of where they felt that they identified. I’m the oldest child I’m the middle child. I’m the oldest of seven I had to care for all my siblings actually creates a psychological component in your codependency.

[Janice Taylor] 14:41
How you see yourself so the oldest child is always born into a fixed codependent triangle. Mothers are often martyrs fathers perpetrators that leaves the oldest child to be the victim in some cases is a triangulation of your human experiences. So I’ll give you an example. When And I know she won’t mind me telling this story. So one of our healers actually was kidnapped when she was eight years old by her mother. And they went, and they lived overseas, and it took several years before her father ever to find her.

[Janice Taylor] 15:13
Now, that has been the story of her data. She was the very One of the very first kids in the years that she actually disappeared that were milk carton kids, kids that were put on the milk carton. If you tell that story over and over again, that would be this is her pain story. And perhaps she spent much of her life looking to find the answers as to why do her mother do that? Why did that happen to me?

[Janice Taylor] 15:35
Why me? Why was I the one that was taking on that? So that’s the story that people tell. Now what she’s doing with it is creating an entire documentary series on children that actually were milking kids. And it turns out that in America, for example, there’s millions of children that get abducted every year by the other parent. Now, everyone’s like, Oh, once they were unique, they think that story’s over.

 

[Janice Taylor] 15:57
But because of her personal experiences, and her pain point, she knows that that’s just actually the beginning of this story. Because now you have to rectify returning home to the parent, you have to rectify, how do I make sense of this. So we were able to take all of her pain data.

[Janice Taylor] 16:11
And now she can use that data of her personal experiences of what she actually survived, not only to create new legislations and laws, which is part of her purpose plan, to creating a documentary series, but also a therapeutic process that completely addresses what happens to these kids, when they come back. Now, we were able to establish all of that in the very first session that she had with a Hapa, we knew that this data had to have a different meaning, it had to have a different point of view.

[Janice Taylor] 16:39
And we take the philosophy that pain must equal purpose, if there is no other point for the pain, if it doesn’t carry the ingredient to do something for a higher good. But many people stay lost in the pain story. This is my story. This is my story, oh, I’m never going to be like them, and I’m going to work hard. My dad didn’t work hard. So I’m working hard. You carve out stories that have emotional pain that may or may not be true based on a perspective that is quite limited, because you’re a child.

[Janice Taylor] 17:08
And so you then spend much of your life operating from your ego from your logic, and not very much time operating from your soul. From what is actually the point of this? Does it actually have a meaning? Now we go to step two, which is the refusal. So once someone sees the calling, people go, No, I can’t I’m not written a documentary, hell, no, I can’t do any of that. That’s not who I am. I’m this, I need to be bills, I need to run a job, forget that. That’s not who I am. So then they go to refusal. And they refuse to gift.

[Janice Taylor] 17:42
And so then there’s a process to unravel. Why am I refusing it? What is in the belief structure of this is the story that I have told myself about my family structures actually, the truth. And so it’s only truth from a perspective. But that perspective has infinite potential other ideas around it.

[Janice Taylor] 18:03
And this is where I looked at neuroscience. And when I say the math, there is math, every human being actually has a very cyclical mathematical pattern of how they live, it’s why we’ve been able to have people addicted to social media, and as much as we have humans are pretty predictable. And there’s a lot of math that actually goes into your own data.

[Janice Taylor] 18:24
And so from that, we’re able to extract what’s what I call your golden triangle data, that’s actually a math problem. So just by virtue of cross referencing time periods, dates, of all of your DNA of your data, all of that, we’re actually able to see that your pain story actually has similar data in your golden triangle data. And humans are much patterned. They’re very predictable.

[Janice Taylor] 18:51
And as I said earlier, emotional pain actually is a system in unleashes in the human experience, a system that controls much of how you think, what you believe about yourself, what you attract to yourself, that’s actually a quite a scientific system. And it’s a response to early trauma points before your 10th birthday.

[Janice Taylor] 19:13
It’s buried into your subconscious into your unconscious part of your being, but emotions live in that iceberg below you. And so when you experience emotion, that’s actually what gets kicked into gear is the system. And it’s an emotional system. And that’s most people operate out of an emotional pain system, not their purpose system.

[Jon Dabach] 19:37
It’s interesting. I mean, you talk about math, and you talk about, you know, predictability. And yet, what’s fascinating is kind of the general, underlying theory sounds like pain has purpose, which is a spiritual concept, right? You’re not going to find that in the scientific literature. So it’s like you’re kind of having this weird bridge between a very technical scientific approach and very spiritual approach.

[Janice Taylor] 20:03
Yes, thank you for recognizing that because that’s actually quite intentional. And this is why I looked across 12 different theories, and also different therapeutic practices, and pulled from them to make my own. Because they were missing each one of the theories were just missing a certain part of the equation.

[Janice Taylor] 20:21
So if you look at cognitive behavioral therapy, which I’m a fan, so for those cognitive behavioral therapists out there, I am a fan. But I also feel that it’s limited. Then if you look at the emergence of humanistic psychology, for example, humanistic in Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, and we talked about sort of the top of the pyramid, which is self-actualization and transcendence. If you think about that, what does that actually mean?

[Janice Taylor] 20:44
Well, that must include the spirit. But Abraham Maslow, and many of his ironically, his peers started to then evolve into something called transpersonal psychology, which acknowledges the spirit. So unless a human being fundamentally believes they don’t have a soul, then a Haas probably not for you. I got no soul. I’m here, then for sure. But most humans, not from religion, if we separate spirituality from religion, yeah, most of us think we have a soul?

[Janice Taylor] 21:17
And is the soul just a dead entity that just sits in the body? Or is it an active component in our life? Can it have an active purpose, and I believe that the component of the soul that’s most powerful is in our emotional healing, that when we talk about a psychic break, it’s in the subconscious, it’s in the unconscious. And Carl Jung really sort of alluded to this again, at the end of his life, where we said, you know, there’s got to be this unconscious subconscious part of our being, well, what is that?

[Janice Taylor] 21:46
Some people will say, well, it’s just, you know, the Freudian side of it, I would argue that that’s an active voice, purpose of your life of your soul, it’s your digital black box, so to speak within yourself, can only get so far with the head of the logic, the cognitive portions of when we are awake, I actually find that quite simple. It’s most of it is quite simpleton, that there needed to be this bridge, and this merge between these two houses of self, so to speak, you have an ego self, and you have a soul self.

[Janice Taylor] 22:18
And we are often operating because of pain from the ego self, not necessarily from the soul self. So how do you merge the two together? And this is what I’ve been studying the last 25 years. And I felt that when anyone says, Well, this is the absolute way, I always felt that there was part of the equation was missing. Well, there’s this other piece of this puzzle.

[Janice Taylor] 22:42
There’s this only, and I’ve been put through the programs as a guinea pig. And because of my own human experiences, and I was always feeling like, okay, part of this theory works, but what about kids that are hungry? What about women? Most of the psychological theories were invented by men.

[Janice Taylor] 22:59
And so if you look at all the fathers of psychology, most of them are missing women. And what about people of color, there’s, there’s more to be learned from these pieces of it. So if you look at even the field of psychology, it only got so far, in the last, you know, probably 3040 years, we’re seeing an emergence of more women in these spaces, even in philosophy, which I studied a lot the philosophy, much of the early philosophers were all men, religious studies, if you look at the religious studies, most of the theories were invented by men.

[Janice Taylor] 23:31
And so if you look at a cultural piece to that, well, what are men taught? What are men culturally wired to believe? They’re traditionally culturally wired to believe that how they think their intellect, they’re solving problems of the head is part of their identity. It’s a part of what gives them validity, where if you look at culturally, what are women taught us? Your mother’s intuition?

[Janice Taylor] 23:57
Where’s your intuition, you should have mother’s intuition. We’re taught actually something different we’re taught to feel. And so if you look at the two pieces of that puzzle, how do we merge that together? So it’s more cohesive in its understanding of our human experience, because there’s much to be learned from those fathers of psychology. But there’s also much to be learned from women and people of color, and culturally, what they’ve encountered in their human experience.

[Janice Taylor] 24:28
And that’s where the spirit and the soul and then feeling portion of our being can be. And so I really looked at the gamut and thought, Okay, where do they all agree? So that’s where I started, okay. Does this theory agree to this theory? And does this theory agree with this one? And I thought, well, if I could find three points of intersection where they all agreed, then we must be on to something in terms of truth. If I felt that only one part of the theory and nobody else agreed with that. I didn’t really look at it that okay, but what is it really saying?

[Janice Taylor] 24:59
And so this entire journey of that took 25 years.

[Jon Dabach] 25:04
Fascinating, fascinating trajectory. When you’re dealing with the wounds or the trauma, it’s kind of it’s putting the purpose on it is such a drastically different approach than a lot of the modern psychological modalities. I mean, even if you look at something as kind of popular right now is EMDR.

[Jon Dabach] 25:27
Right in the name of the title, it’s desensitization. So there’s this idea that if you have trauma to expose yourself to it, because it comes from exposure theory sounds like you expose yourself to it. So it’s no longer traumatic. But then, you’re right, it stops there. So it’s like so you can move on with your life knowing that it just happened to you. And this, do you do desensitization? The trauma, okay? Is that part of you?

[Janice Taylor] 25:54
That’s in phase two, when I call it feeling work, desensitization, exposure therapy, how you want to look at it, it’s such a, it’s such an important evolution in the field of psychology. So I give mad love to that. But then I was like, Okay, once that’s happened, so then what I suppose I have this verse, could that still be enough for the person to know why did this happen to me?

[Janice Taylor] 26:17
Does that solve that nagging sensation of why did this happen to me? And so if we look at Maslow’s hierarchy, if you look at where much of the thorns exist, you know, the thorns, I say, like what’s put into the spirit of this, before the 10th birthday, you start to look at the hierarchy.

[Janice Taylor] 26:34
And you look at food and basic needs, many people have their phones there, because they were grew up poor, like I did, we struggled with food. I remember eating a lot of moldy, moldy things in my life, stealing ketchup packets at a fast food restaurants, because that’s what the sauce was. So I didn’t have to taste out the food was, you know, many people that grew up in the condiment side of the world would relate to that story.

[Janice Taylor] 26:56
That just above that is love and belonging. So if we look at sort of the empathic roots, and the history of that, we know that children need to witness empathy, in order to experience a sense of longing, love, and belonging. And so they need to witness it. And so we know that babies come into the world, actually relational creatures, they come in relational, not just with basic needs, they come in already with a sense of relationship.

[Janice Taylor] 27:20
And much of the early child psychology actually points to this notion of relationship and empathy, when mothers are breastfeeding in the BBC, the faces, like how that all starts to form this sense of self. But if you look at where much of the thorns of human experience go, and where they get stuck, and why many people don’t progress to self-actualization, and onto transcendence, is because they’ve never been able to rectify this sense of love and belonging, which I believe underneath that is the question of do you matter?

 

[Janice Taylor] 27:49
And if you’ve experienced trauma or pain point in any regard, and even though you have the exposure therapy, and you can go through the trauma, are you still left with this sensation of do I matter? And I really think that when you look at the field of technology, wherever they’ve been Silicon Valley has, you know, had been in the startup ecosystem, and is that much of what social media is doing for people in a delusional way.

[Janice Taylor] 28:12
Because it’s temporary, is giving people a sense of love and belonging, oh, I’m part of this group, I’m in this group, I can talk about my traumas, and everybody agrees that I should feel this way or be angry about this, we are seeking that constant need of that validation. And so even if you’re gone through that part of the therapeutic practice, and then the triggering components of your trauma can be lowered and can be released from the body that’s still left at the bottom, I call it the sediment at the bottom of that pain bucket is still the sensation of you wondering whether you matter.

[Jon Dabach] 28:48
Really different approach really interesting kind of perspective of the world and the way human behavior works. If someone’s interested in doing a healing, what is the best way I’m going to post all your links and everything in the show notes so people can obviously, you know, tag and follow and look into more but what’s the easiest and best way for them to connect with us?

[Janice Taylor] 29:10
So they can go right to our website to AHA healing DICOM? That’s probably the easiest if you want to ask me direct questions, hit me up on Twitter, I can DM me on there just be Janice, I answer all sorts of questions about that there. That’s probably the best way to get a hold of me if you want to speak to me directly.

[Janice Taylor] 29:26
If you want to go to Instagram, our team is there as well. But you know, one thing just to leave some of your viewers with if they’re curious to do this at home, if they want to know a little bit of what their golden triangle data is, this is the ultimate question of do you matter?

[Janice Taylor] 29:39
So there’s three points of intersection that every human has. The first is you so you have what we would call your big P. So we call it the big P because pain equals purpose. So it’s your big P It’s when there’s a life change moment, sibling born parents divorced. First memory you have sometimes you have a traumatic event perhaps or even something simple of getting dropped off at kindergarten is screaming your head off when your mother left you there because you did not want to go.

[Janice Taylor] 30:08
But you remember the moment distinctly, that is your first date. So my case, my date is 1983. So that’s my first date. So you have two other intersecting points of data. Those two other intersecting points of dates are people that you attach most of your pain to. So it’s who you think gave you the most pain. Could be your sibling could be your mother and your father.

[Janice Taylor] 30:35
And so if you look at those two dates, let’s just use your mother and father, they to have a big P before their 10th birthday. So all of your big P moments are before your 10th birthday for everyone. And I will say that some people say it’s after, but we use 10 as a coaching as a coaching mechanism for that. Why? Why did you kind of interesting, actually, some of it is biblical.

[Janice Taylor] 30:58
So if you look at sort of the emergence between where we have from Noah, right down to Adam, it was actually decades, you see that our world kind of functions in decades, where we see changes over the years, if you look at the Torah, for example, they use the number 10. And when I looked at child psychology, it felt that yes, some would say before to your fully formed, I looked at this from a collection of data perspective, that much of your data before your 10th birthday, you don’t pick and neither did your parents.

[Janice Taylor] 31:30
So if you look now at your parent’s data, so let’s say that your parents also had divorces or children born, same criteria. So in my case, I look at my mother’s and my father’s dates, then I know I’ve got 1947. And I’ve got 1948. So let’s say that my years now are 1983 47 and 48. Go make a playlist, live in those dates.

[Janice Taylor] 31:55
Those are your collection of data dates, they everything that lies inside of that golden triangle will tell you a lot about who you really are. So what do you mean by living in those days? What does that like for the next two weeks, so and I have a client, we have them eat food from those time periods, let’s say that they were Italian, we have them eat that food, we have them make a playlist for music just from those years.

[Janice Taylor] 32:20
So you’re going to 20 minutes a day play music for me at three, thank God because the music’s really good. I’m like, great, I got a 80s. I’ve got the 40s that’s actually my playlist, I look at movies and news. So what was happening around that time period for my parents and what was happening around me culturally, so the layers of cultural trauma, and we live in those experiences.

[Janice Taylor] 32:43
We research them. So as opposed to scrolling on Twitter for the latest nonsensical thing. You actually live in your golden triangle dates. You take in the content, the movies, and the books. And what most of the ahava clients find is that there is more downloads of data, that they go, Oh my God, this happened.

[Janice Taylor] 33:03
So using the example at the beginning and one of our healer’s case, which she discovered when she discovered her pain point, was the year that they started to put kids on milk cartons that were missing children. She didn’t know that. So hence why her documentary is called Milk Carton kids. Her pain point when she dove into the data, she discovered that in those years, everything shifted and changed.

[Janice Taylor] 33:26
And her pain point was directly related to a cultural change. And so if you think about trauma, trauma is first within yourself. It’s within your family. We talked about intergenerational, but then there’s cultural, what’s happening around these human beings during that time period that would have them change, how they show up in the world, how they would respond. And so those are what I call the rings of trauma. So there’s always layers within this, and then you can discover your golden triangle.

[Jon Dabach] 33:58
Janice Taylor, thank you so much.

[Janice Taylor] 34:01
Thank you for having me.

[Jon Dabach] 34:02
If you’re interested in learning how to get the absolute most out of your romantic relationships, then you’re in luck because I have put together a free workshop or masterclass if you will, about three secrets that people in happy relationships have discovered. You can view the workshop and mrspirituality.com/three secrets again, it’s completely free. Just go there and watch it. It’ll help you on your journey. Give you some wisdom. Some things to think about. The website again is mrspirituality.com/three secrets. That’s mrspirituality.com/the Number three, the word secrets. It’s all yours. Enjoy.